BEG's Spectacular Cooking Hour
by Kriftonucci
Summary: Oneshot crackfic. Berry, Eurotrish, and Goo decide to show us how to make cookies. But when their orange juices have an ingredient they did not expect to have,the result is everything but perfect, and I guess sober.Rated T for obvious reasons.


**Now it's time for:**

**BEG's spectacular cooking hour!**

**Starring:**

**Eurotrish**

**Goo**

**and**

**Berry**

**Take 1**

"Hello everybody! And welcome to our show "BEG's spectacular cooking hour", where we show you how to make the best in delightfully scrumptious pastries in my house!" Began Goo smiling greatly while holding out a glass of orange juice.

"We are so berry glad you decided to watch our show, for we are going to prepare a berry delicious batch of Snowy cookies, in case anyone wants to know earlier than possible before the holidays are here" Berry continued, also holding up a drink of orange juice.

"For this cooking to go begin, we have arranged all of the ingredients in the order of you see them, which are flour, vanilla flavoring extract, eggs, vanilla whipped cream, milk, cinnamon spices, and sprinkles." Said Eurotrish, who pointed her hand onto the table of ingredients, all set up correctly, while her other hand held orange juice as well.

"This will certainly turn out to be a perfect batch of cookies, when nothing can spoil it for all of us to mess up!" Goo finished.

"CHEERS!" They all said gladly.

**Take 2**

"OKAY NOW! Let's start with…..the cooking by…..pudding, PUTTING! Putting the flour inside the bowl, okay?" murmured Goo, who appeared quite dizzy with her eyes mildly closed and her smile crooked.

Once Goo put the flour in the bowl (the entire bag, without measuring), Eurotrish, who was also dazed, said something as well.

"Hold just on a moment! The abuser…..SUGAR! sugar not is here! I'll go get it!" She said, and began to run, when a tripping crash sound was heard.

"I'm okay!" She yelled.

'And don't even forget about the milk and the eggs" Berry said more inebriated while pouring some milk into the bowl, and simply dropping the eggs in there as well.

"Now how's that?!" Said Berry, once finished, dropping the milk and the rest of the eggs on the floor.

"Magnificence, let us drink in honor of this joyous events my sisters!" Said Goo, as she and Berry ineptly poured more of the juice they had previously onto their faces.

"CHEERS!" The three almost failed to say.

**Take 3**

"I believe I can fly, I believe I can touch the sky!" chanted Berry, who was now lying drowsily on the floor with all the spilled milk and cracked egg yolk while moving her arms and legs up and down as though trying to make a snow angel.

Goo appeared to be resting with her entire head submerged inside the bowl's mixture face down into it.

Seconds later, Eurotrish returns.

"I gotta the sugar!" Said Eurotrish, while holding out a packet of salt clumsily.

"About time, BIMBO!" Goo yells out, after sticking her face (which was now covered with eggshells, and the mixture off egg yolk, milk, and flour) out of the bowl.

Once she rubbed some of the mixture out of her eyes, she obtained the packet of salt, and poured some into her mouth.

It was then when she spit it out on Eurotrish, who didn't seem to be perturbed by it, and yelled "WOWEE! They sure don't make abuser like they used to!"

After Goo poured (or I guess put the entire packet of) salt inside the bowl, Berry yelled out "Now that we have our mixture done, it's time for us to pour it on this pan, so we can shape the cookies!"

Berry held out the pan for Goo and Eurotrish to pour the bowl's mixture on it, when they inaccurately pour it all over Berry instead.

"Thanks, chaps, I always wanted a golden shower!" Berry said more hazily than ever, and nauseatingly gags all over the pan, and faints.

"ANOTHER DRINK FOR JAMBOREE!" Goo yelled out as she and Eurotrish drank even more of the juice as though there was no limit.

**Take 4**

"Shaping the coo kings is so much fun, I can make a living out of it" Goo said smiling yet more intoxicated than ever while she and Eurotrish shaped Berry's puke with deodorant caps.

"Here's your order! Held the pickles as you requested, sir!" Shouted Goo as she gave Berry the tray.

As Berry tried to walk with her eyes barely open with the tray in her hands, she tried to continue announcing the instructions as she opened the oven and said "Once you're done with shaping, put the temperature on the oven to-"

"Fahrenheit 9/11 wasn't such a good movie! Mandy Moore should have taken ballet like I did in third grade" Interrupted Goo rankly, as she drank more of the juice she always held in her hand while lying on the refrigerator next to Eurotrish.

"-911 degrees Fahrenheit!" Berry said, as she adjusted to that temperature, and put the tray of her own upchuck inside the oven.

"Now that your tray's inside the oven, we wait for-"

"300! Now there's a movie that made brave heart look like fraggle rock! It's like raining men in that movie!" Interrupted Goo once again.

"Oh yes, that Gerard Butler sing he HICUP! can in the phantom of the HICUP! opera and fight immortals!" Eurotrish added weakly, as she and Goo began singing "Angel of music" together.

"-300 minutes until they will be ready to eat!" Berry added.

**Take 5**

At this point, Goo, Eurotrish and, Berry were sitting on the eggshell, yolk, and milk covered floor, with their eyes about to close and their smiles more crooked than ever.

It was going to be about five hours until their "cookies" were going to ready.

A second later, Berry decides to rub her fingers onto Goo's face, and taste some of the mixture coated onto her face.

"Taste's like chicken!" Berry said.

"You should know, you have it all over yourself, red Papa Smurf!" Goo implied exuberantly livid.

"Yeah, Boy Toys magazines everywhere!" Berry added.

"I can't wait for how the cookies will taste like" Eurotrish said, while curling up her hands.

"NO! I DON'T BELIEVE IN COOTIES ANYMORE!" disrupted Goo puerilely.

"SUCK IT, GOLDY!!" Retaliated the distilled Berry.

**Take 6**

(DING!)

"I'll a get it!" Yelled Eurotrish as she stood up, and walked towards the door.

Once she opened it and saw no one there, she yelled before slamming the door shut "ROTTEN THE NEIGHBORHOOD KIDS AND THEIR SILLY PRANKS!"

Berry suddenly began walking towards the oven from knowing the sound actually meant the oven was done.

"Dumbass! Now that the time is finished, take your oven out of the cookies" Berry continued instructing unsteadily as she opened the oven door.

"And that my friend, is how you make some berry delicious snowy cookies" Said Berry while holding out the tray of fried vomit and deodorant caps she just took out.

"Um, Berry?" Asked Goo, still drinking.

"Yeah Pooh?" Berry answered.

"Heh! You're not wearing mittens are you?" Asked Goo laughing a bit cheerily yet still drowsily.

"………….OW!" yelled Berry, as she threw the tray out the window.

"Houston, we have a liftoff!" Eurotrish said.

" COME BACK HERE !!" Yelled Berry angrily as she tried to climb towards where the window was to retrieve it.

Once she opened the window and jumped out, she landed with a thud on her face.

"What's a thud?" Asked Eurotrish.

"In some countries, it is known to be a delicate and almost endangered species of HOW SHOULD I KNOW?!" Yelled Goo, as the heavy drinking has lead her to become more furious yet lethargic .

With that being told, Goo fainted in which she landed once again on the mildly mixture covered bowl face first.

Eurotrish, not knowing what to do, took out a "Boy Toys" magazine, and began drooling at it's intense contents.

"MISTER DECEMBER, BY BOGGITY!" Eurotrish said rapturously as she held the magazine out vertically spread down to look at the…yup, you guessed it.

The HICUP! end.

------------------------------

**I'm done.**

**You don't have to review, but can you guess what I parodied this from? **


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